Sidebar

[Gareth Branwyn]

This is an email virus. It, along with several of my (unattributed) Jargon
Watch columns, the Good TImes virus hoax, and the Neiman-Marcus Cookie
Recipe hoax, has been handed around through cyberspace for several years.
These terms are from Rich Hall's Sniglets series (don't know from which
volume(s)).

-----Original Message-----
From: Bob Fitzke <fitzke at VOYAGER.NET>
To: ADS-L at LISTSERV.UGA.EDU <ADS-L at LISTSERV.UGA.EDU>
Date: Monday, February 21, 2000 12:50 PM
Subject: Re: Sidebar


>>> >  WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST BUT SHOULD
>>> >  ---------------------------------
>>> >  1. Aquadextrous (akwa deks' trus) adj. Possessing the ability
>>> >  to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.
>>> >
>>> >  2. Carperpetuation (kar 'pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when
>>> >  vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least
>>> >  a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it,
>>> >  then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
>>> >
>>> >  3. Disconfect (diskonfect') v. To sterilize the piece of candy
>>> >  you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming that somehow
>>> >  it will 'remove' all the germs.
>>> >
>>> >  4. Elbonics (el bon' iks) n. The actions of two people
>>> >  maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.
>>> >
>>> >  5. Frust (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be
>>> >  swept onto the dustpan and keeps backing a person across the
>>> >  room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the
>>> >  rug.
>>> >
>>> >  6. Lactomangulation (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling
>>> >  the 'open here' spout on a milk container so badly that one has
>>> >  to resort to the 'illegal' side.
>>> >
>>> >  7. Peppier (pehp ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant
>>> >  whose sole purpose seems to be walking  around asking diners if
>>> >  they want ground pepper.
>>> >
>>> >  8. Phonesia (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone
>>> >  number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
>>> >
>>> >  9. Pupkus (pup' kus) n. The moist residue left on a window
>>> >  after a dog presses its nose to it.
>>> >
>>> >  10. Telecrastination (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of
>>> >  always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick
>>> >  it up, even when you're only six inches away.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gareth Branwyn
Jargon Watch Editor
Wired