Lost positives

[AAllan at AOL.COM]

Here's an enjoyable romp through lost positives:

                          How I met my wife
                            by Jack Winter
               Published 25 July 1994 in the New Yorker

It had been a rough day, so when I walked into the party I was very chalant,
despite my efforts to appear gruntled and consolate.

I was furling my wieldy umbrella for the coat check when I saw her standing
alone in a corner.  She was a descript person, a woman in a state of total
array.  Her hair was kempt, her clothing shevelled, and she moved in a gainly
way.

(etc.)
. . . .
- Allan Metcalf