French swallow consonants, feel full all day! (Weekly World News)

[Bapopik at AOL.COM]

This item from the Weekly World News (at my local supermarket) is  hilarious.
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_http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/stories/2_
(http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/stories/2)
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French Diet Secrets Revealed: Swallow Consonants, Feel Full All Day
By Elizabeth  Morgan October 3, 2006

FLINT, Mich.--The French ability to remain slimmer than  Americans despite a
diet higher in fats and overall calorie density has puzzled  nutritionists for
decades. But a new study suggests that scientists are looking  in the wrong
place for the secret of Gallic leanness, and that staying svelte  may have
nothing to do with food at all.
"The answer is swallowed consonants," said Dr. Eric Gross, professor of
biology at Lester College in Flint. "We're finding that the pronunciation of
these sounds can induce a feeling of satiety in French speakers, and can lead,
over the long-term, to lower body weight."
In French phonology, nearly all terminal consonants tend to be
'swallowed'--silenced via a complex sequence of mouth and throat movements.  Researchers
still debate the mechanism by which these movements result in  feelings of
fullness. Nevertheless, most scientists have focused their  investigations on the
flow and vibration of air in speakers' nasal passages. The  hypothalamus--which
regulates hunger--sits directly above these passages, and  may be affected by
air movements beneath.
Regardless of the cause, the salutary effects of French phonology remain
certain. Dr. Gross' correlational study, soon to be published in the journal
Nomos, reveals that university students enrolled in French language  classes
actually dropped four to six pounds during the course of a twelve-week  semester.
"Obviously, the degree of weight-loss increases in language-immersion
programs, like the Lester College Junior Year Abroad in Aix-en-Provence," Dr.  Gross
said.
Some scientists have rejected the new data, citing smaller portion size in
French culture, or the effects of increased wine consumption, as the real
determinants of Gallic thinness. But Dr. Gross predicts that these researchers
will abandon their theories when faced with the flood of data from a global
swallowed-consonant craze.
"They'll be eating their words, like everyone else," Dr. Gross said.

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