Request about famous rejoinder: I shall be sober to-morrow, whereas you will remain the fool you are to-day. (1882) (Later examples by W. C. Fields and Winston Churchill)

victor steinbok aardvark66 at GMAIL.COM
Mon Aug 8 01:19:28 UTC 2011


The version with Churchill--along with Samuel Johnson and other
attributions--that I heard was much simpler. X [woman] expresses her outrage
that Y [man] is drunk. Y responds, "That is undeniably true, mam. But, in
the morning, I shall be sober and you will still be ugly."

Another somewhat related anecdote also involves Samuel Johnson--or some
other large, profusely sweating man. The story claims, Johnson was walking
in a garden (presumably some sort of public garden) and, being tired, sat
down on a bench. An old woman, already sitting on the bench, exclaimed,
"Fee! Sir, you SMELL!" This was met with a reply, "No, ma'am! *You* smell,
*I* stink!".

VS-)


On Sun, Aug 7, 2011 at 6:13 PM, Garson O'Toole <adsgarsonotoole at gmail.com>wrote:

>
> There are two famous rejoinders to accusations of inebriation. One is
> attributed to W. C. Fields and the other to Winston Churchill. Here is
> the response of W. C. Fields when told "Your drunk" in the 1934 film
> "It’s a Gift."  Strictly speaking credit goes to the screenwriter and
> not to Fields for this quip. (The Quote Verifier and Yale Book of
> Quotations versions differ slightly so I will list both):
>
> Yeah, and you’re crazy. I’ll be sober tomorrow, but you’ll be crazy
> the rest of your life.
>
> Yeah, and you're crazy. But I'll be sober tomorrow, and you'll be
> crazy for the rest of your life.
>
> Here is the Churchill anecdote reported in "Churchill by Himself: The
> Definitive Collection of Quotations" by Richard Langworth. The words
> are based on the testimony of a bodyguard named Ronald Golding who
> described an incident that supposedly occurred in 1946:
>
> [Bessie Braddock MP: "Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are
> disgustingly drunk."]
> Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly
> ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly
> ugly.
>
> These two anecdotes can be grouped together in a class. The earliest
> instance I've located of a member of this class is dated 1882.
>
> Cite: 1882 August 05, The Daily Republican-Sentinel, His Advantage,
> Page 5, Column 2, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. (19th Century U.S. Newspapers
> Gale)
>
> A Conservative member of the House of Commons, who talks much on
> foreign affairs, but not wisely, was passing last week through palace
> yard, when a man ran against him. "Do you know, sir, who I am?" said
> the member, "I am Mr. --, M.P." "What?" irreverently answered the man,
> "are you Mr. --, the greatest fool in the House of Commons?" "You are
> drunk," exclaimed the M.P. "Even if I am," replied the man, "I have
> the advantage over you - I shall be sober to-morrow, whereas you will
> remain the fool you are to-day."
>
> The question I pose for the list members concerns a periodical called
> "Truth" in which this anecdote reportedly appeared. Here is the
> reference data that I have:
> Truth, vol. xii. p. 112.
>
> Does anyone know if "Truth" has been digitized in some database? I
> found volume 10 in Google Books but I cannot find volume 12. The date
> is around 1882. Here is a link to what I think is volume 10 of the
> periodical:
>
> http://books.google.com/books?id=EcgcAQAAMAAJ&
>
> This reference to "Truth" appears in a footnote to a reprinting of the
> anecdote that appeared here:
>
> Cite: 1883 May, The National Review, On the Literary Advantages of
> Grub Street by Thomas Tantivy, Page 384, W. H. Allen & Co., London.
>
> http://books.google.com/books?id=fNLUAAAAMAAJ&q=%22be+sober%22#v=snippet&
>
>
> For interested readers here are some additional examplesin this class
> of anecdotes.
>
> Cite: 1890 March 27, The American Stationer, Roundabouts by The Trade
> Lounger, Page 745, Column 1, Howard Lockwood & Co., New York.
>
> It is said that a lady and a gentleman the other day entered a
> Broadway surface road car at the same moment, the former by the rear
> door, the latter by the front. There was only one seat vacant and the
> gentleman at once took it, but it happened to be next to one occupied
> by a man who evidently "had a load on." This man at once arose and,
> offering his seat to the lady, said: "Madam, take my seat; I am drunk
> to-day, but to-morrow I shall be sober." Then pointing to the one who
> had just sat down, he added: "But that man is a hog to-day and he'll
> be a hog to-morrow!"
>
> http://books.google.com/books?id=JztYAAAAYAAJ&q=%22be+sober%22#v=snippet&
>
>
> Here is a version of the tale in 1892 that once again features M.P.s.
>
> Cite: 1892 December 17, Pick-Me-Up, Page 183, Column 1, Volume 9,
> Number 220, Published at the Office of Pick-Me-Up, London.
>
> Two M.P.'s meet in the Lobby, one an ardent --- the other an equally
> ardent ---. One has dined "not wisely, but too well," and salutes the
> other with: "You're a fool, Brown-Jones, a downright fool."
>
> He is met with the reply: "Now, now, Robinson, you're drunk." To which
> the retort is given: "Well, if I am drunk (hic) I shall be sober
> to-morrow morning (hic), but a fool is a fool (hic) through all his
> life."
>
> http://books.google.com/books?id=bIUXAQAAMAAJ&q=%22be+sober%22#v=snippet&
>
>
> In 1900 a multi-volume diary was published by Augustus John Cuthbert
> Hare and in volume 5 he told a story that fits this pattern. If the
> 1882 date on the diary entry is correct then this is actually the
> earliest instance of the anecdote I have located:
>
> Cite: 1900, The Story of My Life: Volume V by Augustus J. C. Hare,
> [Diary entry dated July 16, 1882], Page 362, George Allen, London.
> (Google Books full view)
>
> "July 16. -- After luncheon, we had a pleasant walk to Knockholt
> Beeches -- Lady Northcote, the two Stanhope brothers, Mr. Banks
> Stanhope, Lady Margaret, and I. Afterwards, sitting on the stone
> platform in front of the house, Sir Stafford Northcote told us –
>
> "'The great A.B. was tremendously jostled the other day in going down
> to the House. A.B. didn't like it. "Do you know who I am?" he said; "I
> am a Member of Parliament and I am Mr. A.B." -- "I don't know about
> that," said one of the roughs, "but I know that you're a damned fool."
> -- "You're drunk," said A.B.; "you don't know what you're saying." --
> "Well, perhaps I am rather drunk to-night," said the man, "but I shall
> be sober to-morrow morning; but you're a damned fool tonight, and
> you'll be a damned fool to-morrow morning."'
>
> There are more examples in 1904, 1911, 1925, 1932, 1936, and 1938, but
> I have not verified each one of these citations yet.
>
> If someone can help with the reference to the Truth periodical I would
> be very appreciative.
>
> Garson
>

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