LL-L "Terms of address" 2004.04.22 (10) [E]

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From: R. F. Hahn <sassisch at yahoo.com>
Subject: Lexicon

Elsie wrote under "Language varieties":

> Fred and Ron, from my position, the "Oubaas" word is an endearment
> and a respectful form for an older person. There are different uses:
> 1 Some older wives might call their older husbands that.
> 2 Younger people might refer to a much older man that way.
> 3 Many black men and women still refer to older white men in the form.

OK, so you had won me over at the beginning, when you mentioned "endearment"
and "respectful."  Then you lost me again in your enumeration ...  8-]  But
then again, perhaps I should just stop wiggling and squirming, shouldn't I,
should leave it up to "yous guys"?

This reminds me of my initial struggle against being addressed and referred
to as _Oom_ (< Dutch for 'uncle') in Indonesia (when I was in my early
thirties), even by elderly people, even in Indonesian and Javanese.  I
didn't exactly feel comfortable with the association with colonialism.
However, struggling against it was futile, because (1) I couldn't change the
way people perceived me (based on physical appearance and attributed social
status), and (2) this form of address represented the only niche there was
for me in the complex social structure of Javanese society. I decided that
having at least one niche in which to fit was better than having none at all
and thus being ignored due to embarrassment over lack of social reference
and fear of faux pas (as experiences in Japan had taught me).


Regards,
Reinhard/Ron

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