"the" wife

[Peter Richardson]

Yesterday our laminate installer said he'd be on the job today "as soon as
the wife leaves for work." "The wife" has been around for a long time, but
has anyone ever heard "the husband" used the same way? e.g. "I'll leave as
soon as the husband gets back with the car." My sense is that most women
would say MY husband. "The wife" smacks of "So how's the wife and kids,
Eddie?" There's something here, too, that reminds me of car salesman
lingo: "The driver's seat reclines, but her seat doesn't," "her" being
either too noble or too lowly to warrant more explicit reference.
Naturally, the only drivers out there are male, and "she," or "the" wife,
is the nameless appendage across the way. Are there any articles that
focus on the linguistic, rather than the more broadly social, side of this
phenomenon?

Peter Richardson