a faux-WOTY after all

[Laurence Horn]

I had high hopes reading today's Times article (first page, SundayStyles
section) about bras ("Quest to Soothe the Savage Breast", by Penelope
Green), which had several mentions of "outplants", defined here as "a
couple of ounces of silicone and Lycra...-just one of many new bras
designed to give you a competitive edge, or at least make you feel like the
heroine of a Barbara Cartland nove.  Implants, who needs 'em?"

But I did turn up a couple of other relevant hits (not counting the wayward
verb forms) of 'outplant(s)' on Nexis, one from a charming anecdote related
by the Guardian--
====================
August 6, 1999

SECTION: Guardian Features Pages; Pg. 10

HEADLINE: Neil Barrett

BODY:
    Chest padding is no longer the skinny third former's best kept secret:
these days, everyone's at it. Jennifer Aniston had a pair of those funny
silicone
'outplants' that look like skinless chicken breast fillets tucked in her
bra when a stray skewer in an LA restaurant pierced one of them, sending
silicone
squirting across the room. Apparently she was mortified. Can't think why.
I'd have thought she'd be counting her lucky stars she was wearing them.
================
--and one even earlier, from another British daily, the Daily Telegraph (16
April 1997), citing 'an advert...for "American-designed Silicone Outplants"
for a fuller bustline'.  So "outplant" is not brand-new, more's the pity;
evidently I just haven't been travelling in the right circles.  Whether
it's a candidate for The Most Unnecessary is something we can ponder
between now and January.

larry