Paul Frank paulfrank at POST.HARVARD.EDU
Sat Nov 3 10:08:58 UTC 2001

Is Disappearing
What TV news doing to our precious verbs.
By Michael Kinsley
Salon, November 1, 2001
To be or not to be? That remaining the question, the answer increasingly
clear. The verb "to be" dying out, and the culprit? None other than TV news
channels. Taking the place of such cherished words as "is," "are," "am,"
even "were" and "was": a new verb form that you might call the
one-size-fits-all past, present, and future participle. Or you might call it
the one-size-fits-all past, present, and future gerund. One of these right
and one of them wrong, but which which? Nobody really knowing the difference
between a participle and a gerund. Anyone claiming to understand the
distinction probably bluffing. So calling it what you wish: Either label

What I talking about? Just listen to Lou Dobbs, the dean of news network
anchorpersons, at the top of his show, CNN's Lou Dobbs Moneyline, on
Tuesday, Oct. 30. Lou saying, "Top government officials today adding their
voices to the call for Americans to remain vigilant." (I not kidding: These
his opening words on that evening's program.)

Lou continuing, after a couple of clips of politicians talking something
close to normal English, "The president planning to do just that [just what
not clear in context], scheduled to throw out the first pitch in game three
of the World Series ." adding, "And new traces of anthrax, traces found in
additional buildings in the nation's Capital today."

Lou Dobbs not alone. (When serving as the lead example in a journalistic
trend story, you never alone.) Nor limiting this trend to anchors-who, as
gods among us, making their own rules. Ordinary TV reporters doing it, too.
First, though, they must paying obeisance to the anchor-god with the magic
words, "That's right, Lou" (or whomever-I not meaning to pick on Lou Dobbs).
The anchor having just said something like, "And now to Washington, where
MSNBC's Amanda Stakeout reporting tonight that President Bush spending the
afternoon consulting by telephone with other world leaders. Any hopes for an
early agreement, Amanda?"

This known as the "toss." It remains a point of pride among anchors and
those who write their scripts to summarize a reporter's story so succinctly
in the toss that he or she having no choice but to begin by saying, "That's
right, Lou." The reporter then repeating, murderously, "The president
spending this afternoon consulting by telephone with other world leaders.
Aides saying tonight hope for an early agreement. Back to you, you
[unintelligible] . um . Lou."

Wonderful about this universal gerundiciple, or whatever we calling it? That
it working equally well as a substitute for the traditional past, present,
and future tenses. "Madonna entertaining American troops in Peshawar this
evening" could refer to something that already happened, something happening
now, or something about to happen. The total effect making one dizzy. Past,
present, and future melting together as every newsworthy event taking place
simultaneously in some dimension beyond the reach of time, where man forever
biting dog and yet it remaining news.

What happening here? No easy answers but some uninformed speculation. Long
part of vernacular English: referring to the future as the present. ("Honey,
I'm meeting with Democratic leaders tonight in a spirit of bipartisan
cooperation. Don't wait up.") Add the established convention of newspaper
headlines-referring to the past as the present. ("House Passes Tax Cut.")
When, as sometimes happens, there remains a need to refer to the present as
the present, newspaper headlines leave out the "is" and its variants.
("White House Considering More Tax Cuts.")

So, TV news borrows the conventions of newspaper headlines. These
conventions developing out of a need for compression, but after a couple of
centuries imparting an automatic sense of drama and urgency. I suspecting
the trend of TV news talking in headline-ese traceable to Rupert Murdoch,
who buys the New York Post many years ago and founding Fox TV News more
recently. The Post famous for its brilliant headlines. Fox News, though
hypocritical about denying its brazen right-wing politics, the most creative
of the TV news networks.

But where it all ending? God knowing tonight. Back to you, Lou.

Paul Frank
English translation from Chinese, German,
French, Italian, Spanish, and Portuguese
Tel. +33 450 709 990 - Thollon, France
E-mail: paulfrank at

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