Gobbledegook

[Duane Campbell]

Besides the WOTY, perhaps someone should establish a marketing
gobbledegook award. Some is benign, but occasionally it rises to stunning
proportions.

"Easy to store" for a Black and Decker jar opener the size of a compact
washer/dryer -- how did we live without one -- I can live with. But there
is an eye moisturizer being advertised now, and I watched the commercial,
pen in hand, several times to make sure I got this right. It contains
"biologic aqua absolute standard premium grade of pure all natural
water." Distilled water. Eighty-nine cents a gallon if you go two aisles
down.

D