Riddles from Cumberland County (1963)

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Summer 1963, Keystone Folklore Quarterly (Quarterly Journal of the Pennsylvania Folklore Society), vol. VIII, no. 2
Pages 59-74:
Riddles from Cumberland County'
by Mac E. Barrick
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Like many folklore collection, this is not strictly "Cumberland County." I just like the selection here of classic American riddles.
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Pg. 60:
What is green with yellow spots, ten legs and a long red tail?
--I don't know.
--I don't know either, but there's one on your neck.
(Carlisle, 1951)
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What stands on four legs?
--A chair.
Mrs. Bertha Gutshall, c. 1905.
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What has two heads and one body?
--Barrel.
J. Russell Barrick, before 1910.
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What stands on one foot and has its heart in its head?
--Cabbage.
Mrs. Ella Barrick, n.d. (I'll just list the ones with dates--ed.)
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Pg. 61:
What has two backbones and a thousand ribs?
--Railroad track.
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What goes out with four feet and comes in with eight?
--Cat with a mouse.
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What has eyes and can't see?
--Potato.
Mrs. Bertha Gutshall, before 1905.
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What has eyes and cannot see, and has a head and cannot hear?
--Potatoes and cabbage.
J. Russell Barrick, before 1910.
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What has ears and can't hear?
--Corn.
Albert Gutshall, 1900-1905.
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What has a tongue and can't talk?
--Wagon.
Mrs. Bertha Gutshall, 1903-1905.
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What has teeth and can't eat?
--Saw.
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What has four eyes and can't see?
--Mississippi.
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Pg. 62:
What eats and eats and never gets full?
--Threshing machine.
Mrs. Bertha Gutshall, before 1910.
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What has four legs, one head and one foot, can't walk and can't talk?
--Bed.
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What has three feet and can't walk?
--Yardstick.
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Pg. 64:
What wears a coat all winter and pants in the summer?
--Dog.
J. Russell Barrick, before 1910.
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What grows with its roots up?
--An icicle.
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Pg. 65:
What's black and white and red all over?
--A newspaper.
Common before 1900.
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What's black and white and red all over?
--A sun-burned Zebra.
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Pg. 66:
What goes up the chimney down but won't come down the chimney up?
--Umbrella.
J. Russell Barrick, c. 1905.
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The more you take away, the bigger it gets.
--Hole.
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What is it that if you cut it at either end, it gets longer?
--A ditch.
J. Russell Barrick, before 1910.
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A fellow was in jail and they told him if he told a riddle they couldn't answer, they'd let him go, so he said:
Brothers and sister have I none,
But this man's father was my father's son.
--The man was his son.
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It's not my sister, not my brother,
But still the child of my father and mother.
--Me.
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Pg. 67:
How many sides has a jug?
--Two: inside and outside.
J. Russell Barrick, 1905-1910.
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Pg. 69:
What's the longest word in the English language?
--Smiles. There's a mile between the first and last letter.
MEB, before 1951.
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Pg. 70:
How do you tell the weight of a fish?
--Look at his scales.
C. K. Snyder, c. 1944.
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How do you get down off an elephant?
--You don't. You get down off geese.
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What kind of flowers do your lips represent?
--Tulips.
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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple?
--Finding half a worm.
Mrs. Ella Barrick, before 1910.
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What's the difference between an old penny and a new dime?
--Nine cents.
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What's the difference between one yard and two yards?
--A fence.
MEB, before 1950.
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Pg. 71:
What building has the most stories?
--The Library.
MEB, 1942-46.
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Which is faster, heat or cold?
--Heat, anybody can catch cold.
MEB, c. 1940.
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What's the first thing a farmer plants in his field?
--His foot.
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What comes after cheese?
--Mice.
James R. Barrick, before 1918.
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What time is it when the clock strikes thirteen?
--Time to get the clock fixed.
Bertha Gutshall, before 1910.
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When is a door not a door?
--When it's ajar.
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If you wake up at night thirsty, what do you do?
--Life up the mattress and drink out of the spring.
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Where were the first doughnuts fried?
--In grease.
Mrs. Ella Barrick, c. 1905.
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Where did they first put holes in doughnuts?
--In the center.
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Which side of a dog has the most hair?
--The outside.
J. Russell Barrick, before 1910.
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Pg. 72:
Why is the nose in the middle of the face?
--Because it's the scenter.
MEB, before 1946.
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Why does the chicken cross the road?
--To get to the other side.
Common before 1910.
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What's the reason chickens don't lay eggs at night?
--They're all roosters.
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Why do firemen wear red suspenders?
--To keep their pants up.
Common before 1950.
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Why does Uncle Sam wear red-white-and-blue suspenders?
--To keep his pants up.
J. Russell Barrick, c. 1942.
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What made the lobster blush?
--He spied the salad dressing.
MEB, c. 1948.
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Pg. 73:
Did you ever see a horse fly?
--A horsefly.
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Did you ever see a board walk?
--A board-walk.
Mrs. Ella Barrick, before 1920.
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Did you ever see a milk man?
--A milk-man.
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Did you ever see a paper boy?
--A paperboy.
MEB, before 1946.
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Tom and Dick and Pinch-Me went out in a boat. Tom and Dick fell out. WHo was left?
--WHen someone answers "Pinch-Me," the riddler pinches him.
Mrs. Ruth Heishman, before 1940.
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Can you stick out your tongue and touch your ear?
--Stick out tongue and touch ear with finger.
Mrs. Ella Barrick, before 1942.
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Pg. 74:
If the wind is blowing toward a maple tree at ten miles an hour, which side of the tree will the acorns fall on?
--Acorns don't grow on maple trees.
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Pete and Repeat were out in a boat. Pete fell out. WHo was left?
--When someone answers "Repeat," the riddler repeats the riddle.
Lester King, c. 1942.
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(I'll research these in another post--ed.)