Church key anecdote

[Laurence Horn]

At 6:47 PM -0500 2/25/05, Dennis R. Preston wrote:
>No, you cannot screw the top back on; wine and beer go flat.

Not in three hours, though.  Trust me on that.

and at 4:04 PM -0800 2/25/05, Peter A. McGraw wrote:
>>  Next, there will be a set of instructions for use.
>>("Place protruding flange of triangular device against lid of can,
>>apply pressure at a 90 degree angle...")
>
>No, no, Larry--next there will be a page of dire WARNING!s (marked by
>triangular yellow traffic-type signs containing a large exclamation point)
>about the many creative ways you could injure yourself through improper
>use, admonitions not to swallow the opener or use it to pull your own
>teeth, remove ear wax, etc.
>
...or to attempt to gain illegal entry into houses of worship.
And a disclaimer to the effect that the manufacturer is not liable
for any injuries incurred by using object as sex toy, etc.

L