NELLIE or NELLY

[Wilson Gray]

I agree with your suggestion that the term is not well known among
outgroups. I've known the gay referent of "nelly/nellie" since God
knows when, but only as a literary term.  Like "Nelly," I, too, grew up
black in St. Louis, where, among blacks, at least, for some reason,
there was a dearth of terms for gay people. The only term that I knew
for a lesbian was "bulldagga," This was used only in the abstract,
since it was never applied to an actual woman or girl. In fact, I don't
think that we even understood what it meant for a woman to be gay. For
gay men, there were "punk," do-funny," "sissy," and ,,, uh, I guess
that's it. Even these words were restricted to guys who were clearly
effeminate,  "flaming-fagot" types, since a fair number of
supposedly-straight guys bragged about the money that could be made
from what was essentially whoring with gay guys. ["Shit, if he'd-a
slapped a twinty inta yo' hand, you'd-a fucked him, too!"] There was no
"down low" in those days. I tended to take these stories with a box of
salt. That is, I believed that guys did this. I just didn't believe
that they could make that kind of money doing it. In the late '40's and
early '50's, twenty bucks was a month's rent, for God's sake!

On the other hand, though, who doesn't know that "Nellie/Nelly" is a
girl's name? Remember the baseball player, Nelson Fox? I never was able
to understand his letting himself be referred to as "Nellie."

-Wilson Gray

On Jul 11, 2005, at 10:44 AM, Jesse Sheidlower wrote:

> ---------------------- Information from the mail header
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> Sender:       American Dialect Society <ADS-L at LISTSERV.UGA.EDU>
> Poster:       Jesse Sheidlower <jester at PANIX.COM>
> Subject:      Re: NELLIE or NELLY
> -----------------------------------------------------------------------
> --------
>
> On Mon, Jul 11, 2005 at 08:28:34AM -0400, RonButters at AOL.COM wrote:
>> A gay male friend (age 50) recently used the word NELLY/NELLIE to
>> describe
>> his windowboxes; I understood this to mean 'effeminate', but I also
>> had several
>> years ago formed the opinion that this is a somewhat archaic term.
>>
>> 1. How well known is this term outside gay circles?
>> 2. Is it still in use by gay men under the age of 50?
>
> The recent sources I have for this are chiefly in homosexual use,
> which would suggest that it is still in use by younger gay men
> and perhaps that it's not widely known outside.
>
> The existence of a popular rap performer with the stage name
> "Nelly" (birth name Cornell Haynes, Jr.) regularly brings a
> smile to my face; I'd assume that this choice of name (he is
> strongly heterosexual, at least if his lyrics are to be
> believed) could not be made if _nelly_ 'effeminate' were widely
> known. One couldn't image a straight rapper named "Swishy",
> for example.
>
> Jesse Sheidlower
> OED
>