Q: Pupil of the eye as the most expansive male organ

[Jonathan Lighter]

Bill's list is far more rigorous than my classmate's. Only the first six riddles are familiar to me.

  I heard Number 2 in, I believe, the spring of 1965.  It was rumored in my high school that the well-known frenetic host of a local TV "kid's show" (much watched by teens of the day for its absurd humor) had been fined or taken off the air for asking, "Kids, what's the shortest word there is that starts with F and ends with CK ?"  The answer, of course, was "firetruck." (Check your 1965 dictionary !)

  Self-hypnotic regression suggests that the fifth riddle of the "Turtle Club" set I heard may well have been Number 5, with the "bubblegum" conundrum popping up a little later in a non-Turtle context.

  Whippersnappers may need to be reminded that Wally Schirra was one of America's first seven astronauts and later a frequent space-launch commentator for CBS News.

  JL



"Mullins, Bill AMRDEC" <Bill.Mullins at US.ARMY.MIL> wrote:
  ---------------------- Information from the mail header -----------------------
Sender: American Dialect Society
Poster: "Mullins, Bill AMRDEC"
Subject: Re: Q: Pupil of the eye as the most expansive male organ
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>
> Indeed, the four-letter word ending in "k" that means
> "intercourse" was "talk" and the action described was shaking hands.
>
> If rekindled memory serves - ha ! - these particular
> questions were associated with "membership" in a mythical
> organization called "The Turtle Club." If you could answer
> all of them correctly, you were a member of the club and
> somebody had to buy somebody a drink.
>
> I believe further that the kid with the questions even had
> a pink novelty "business card" with the "Turtle Club" info on it.
>

Are You a Turtle?
You Bet Your Sweet Ass I Am.

Google "Wally Schirra" and "Turtle Club" for background.

Questions:

1. What does a woman do sitting down that a man does standing up and a
dog does on three legs?
2. What word begins with the letter F and ends with CK?
3. What's hairy, hard and sticks out of a mans pajamas at night?
4. What four letter word ends in K and means intercourse?
5. What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two?
6. What goes in hard but comes out soft and wet?
7. What does a dog do that a man steps in?
8. What can you find in a man's pants that is about six inches long, has
a head on it, and that women love so much they often blow?
9. What is the word that is four letters long, ends in u-n-t that is
used to discribe a woman?
10. What four letter word begins with F and ends with K, and if you
can't get one you can use your hands?
11. What is hard, about six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a
girl fat?
12. What four letter word ends in i-t and is found on the bottom of bird
cages?
13. What is it that all men have one of, that is longer on some men than
others, that the Pope doesn't use, and that a man gives his wife after
they're married?
14. What is it on a man that gets very large when he gets excited?
15. What is long , round, wet and full of seamen?


1. Shake hands
2. Firetruck
3. His head
4. Talk
5. Legs
6. Gum
7. Pants
8. Twenty Dollar Bill
9. Aunt
10. Fork
11. Almond Joy
12. Grit
13. Last Name
14. Pupils
15. Submarine

------------------------------------------------------------
The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org



---------------------------------
Yahoo! Sports Fantasy Football ’06 - Go with the leader. Start your league today!

------------------------------------------------------------
The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org