"Kicking footballs"

Benjamin Zimmer bgzimmer at BABEL.LING.UPENN.EDU
Sat Oct 28 13:36:58 UTC 2006


On 10/27/06, Scot LaFaive <spiderrmonkey at hotmail.com> wrote:
>
> I've always considered the phrase "up your ass kicking footballs" (as in if
> you ask someone where the phone is, they might say "If it was up your ass
> kicking footballs you'd know it/know where it is") to be fairly common. But
> imagine my horror when I look in The Google and only find two hits (one with
> "kicking" and one with "kickin"). Am I wrong? Is this not a common phrase?
> I've heard it quite a few times here in Wisconsin (mainly central WI), but
> now I'm wondering if I haven't heard it from the same three people all my
> life. My world really isn't that small, is it?

FWIW, variations on this theme can readily be found without the
"kicking footballs" elaboration:

http://www.google.com/search?q="if+*+was|were+up+your+ass"

For instance, an indie band out of Baltimore recorded an album with
the title, "'If It Was Up Your Ass You'd Know It."


--Ben Zimmer

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