"Gray Rape" (from NY Times)

[Charles Doyle]

Hey, y'all--

I wasn't suggesting that drugged-stranger rape is something less heinous than plain old rape. I was just wondering how common it is to refer to DSR as "date rape"! It's that philological thing we do . . . .

--Charlie
____________________________________________________________

---- Original message ----
>Date: Tue, 16 Oct 2007 23:17:07 -0400
>From: Wilson Gray <hwgray at GMAIL.COM>
>Subject: Re: "Gray Rape" (from NY Times)
>
>I agree with you. If one party is drugged so that she is not only unable to give consent, but is also completely unaware of even being in a situation that normally requires consent, how can that be anything but plain, old rape, whether the people involved be siblings or total strangers?
>
>"Grey rape" sounds more like a situation in which a girl might say, "Iwas too drunk to know what he was doing to me" and the guy says, "I don't remember her saying no, but I was pretty drunk, myself." But this sort of thing is not made new by giving it a new name.
>
>-Wilson
>
>On 10/16/07, Sarah Lang <slang at uchicago.edu> wrote:
>>
>> I have always understood "date-rape" to be rape committed by someone
>> who was, however briefly, known to the victim. So, from my
>> understanding, if the victim met someone at a bar and had one drink
>> with him or her that was dosed: date-rape, or if you like,
>> acquaintance rape (I would use the former in colloquial speech). If
>> that victim were dosed by someone she or he never actual met or spoke
>> to, I would call that just plain, old-fashioned rape, even if a "date-
>> rape" drunk was used.
>>
>> Grey-rape, whether a ridiculous or harmful term or not, seems to be
>> referring to the "we were both really drunk, I didn't want to before
>> but . . . wait, what happened?" sort of territory. If only one party
>> were intoxicated and therefore unable to consent: easy (well easier).
>> But if both are it's . . . kinda grey as neither are legally able to
>> give consent.
>>
>> (I think I'll end there, as rape is simply a far, far too complex
>> word, historically, legally, rhetorically, etc. to really do it and
>> its meanings or usages justice.)
>>
>> S.
>>
>> On Oct 16, 2007, at 8:20 AM, Charles Doyle wrote:
>> >
>> > A feature article on date rape in the student newspaper a few days ago discussed, as a kind of DATE RAPE, the surreptitious drugging and abducting of a stranger or slight acquaintance--for instance, at a bar or a party. Is that a common use or understanding of the term? Doesn't a date rape have to involve a "date"--therefore, possibly, a "grayer" area of conduct?
>> >
>> > Maybe there has been a sort of cognitive back-formation of the informal term "date-rape drug": any rape involving the use of such a drug becomes a date rape.
>> >
>> > --Charlie
>> > ____________________________________________________________
>> >
>> > ---- Original message ----
>> >> Date: Tue, 16 Oct 2007 00:11:00 -0400
>> >> From: Barry Popik <bapopik at GMAIL.COM>
>> >> Subject: "Gray Rape" (from NY Times)
>> >> To: ADS-L at LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
>> >
>> >> ...
>> >> http://cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/10/15/gray-rape-a-new-form-
>> >> of-date-rape/
>> >> October 15, 2007,  4:00 pm
>> >> 'Gray Rape': A New Form of Date Rape?
>> >> By Sewell Chan
>> >>
>> >> When Robert D. Laurino, chief assistant prosecutor for Essex
>> >> County in New Jersey, told a friend that he was speaking on a
>> >> panel about the topic of "gray rape," the friend was confused.
>> >> "Are you talking about
>> >> the rape of the elderly?" the friend asked.
>> >>
>> >>
>> >> An article in the September issue of Cosmopolitan magazine, "A New
>> >> Kind of Date Rape," defined "gray rape" as "sex that falls
>> >> somewhere between consent and denial and is even more confusing
>> >> than date rape because often both parties are unsure of who wanted
>> >> what."
>> >>
>> >> A standing-room-only audience packed the lobby of the Gerald W.
>> >> Lynch Theater at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice this
>> >> morning to listen to a vigorous panel discussion on the idea of
>> >> "gray rape" — and whether the term is even meaningful, helpful or
>> >> harmful. Not too many events in the intellectual life of New York
>> >> City bring together Jeremy Travis, the legal expert and former
>> >> city police official who is the president of John Jay, and Kate
>> >> White, editor in chief ofCosmopolitan, which sponsored the event.
>> >>
>> >> ------------------------------------------------------------
>> >> The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org
>> >
>> > ------------------------------------------------------------
>> > The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org
>>
>> ------------------------------------------------------------
>> The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org
>>
>
>
>--
>All say, "How hard it is that we have to die"---a strange complaint to
>come from the mouths of people who have had to live.
>-----
>                                              -Sam'l Clemens
>
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