Blue Balls

Sun Jun 7 17:41:48 UTC 2009

At 12:36 PM -0400 6/7/09, Jonathan Lighter wrote:
>John-Patrick could not get this through and he's asked me to forward these
>authentic exx.
>Warning: For "blue balls" devotees only.
>JL
>--- On Sat, 6/6/09, John-Patrick
><email1 at folklore.ms<http://us.mc539.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=email1@folklore.ms>>
>wrote:
>
>From: John-Patrick
><email1 at folklore.ms<http://us.mc539.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=email1@folklore.ms>
>>
>Subject: Fw: Re:"Blue balls"
>To: "Jonathan YAHOO Lighter"
><wuxxmupp2000 at yahoo.com<http://us.mc539.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=wuxxmupp2000@yahoo.com>
>>

Well, I'd be interested in reading these, but after 10 minutes of
trying to open any of them (even after signing up for yahoo mail as
instructed on the web site to which I was directed), I am stymied.  I
can read about bodies discovered bobbing in the ocean near Brazil on
Yahoo News, but I don't see any of the above messages.  Any hints?

LH

>Date: Saturday, June 6, 2009, 6:18 AM
>
>
>
>Jon,
>
>For some reason I can't post to the ADS list.=C2=A0 Could you forward this?
>
>----- Original Message -----=20
>From: "JohnPatrick"
><j0hnpatrick at aol.com<http://us.mc539.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=j0hnpatrick@aol.com>
>>
>To:
><hwgray at GMAIL.COM<http://us.mc539.mail.yahoo.com/mc/compose?to=hwgray@GMAIL.COM>
>>
>Sent: Friday, June 05, 2009 4:15 PM
>Subject: Re:"Blue balls"
>
>
>Greetings,
>
>It seems that "Blue balls" can be a venereal disease (that causes the
>scrotum to turn blue) or a condition of sexual lust.
>
>Below are several examples of "blue balls" from various songs.
>
>Yours,
>
>John Patrick
>~
>
>Sung to the tune of "Sound Off" below is a link that ends in the
>following verse:
>
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0"Ho Chi Min is a son of a bitch!
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Got the blue balls, crabs and the seven year=EF=BB=
>=BF itch"
>
>
>=C2=A0 From here:=C2=A0 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DjPwYWzrK1fc
>
>
>This segment is from the movie "Full Metal Jacket".
>
>
>
>
>>>From the song "The Castration of the Strawberry Roan" performed by The
>Sons of the Pioneers and recorded in 1942:
>
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0O, that strawberry roan
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0How many colts has he thrown?
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0He's got gonorrhea, the glanders and syph
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0The blue-balls and claps
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0But his tool is still stiff
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Look out for that strawberry roan
>
>
>
>
>>>From the song "Ring-Dang-Do" sung by Glenn Orlin. First learned in the
>1950s while cowboying.
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0From Arkansas come a son-of-a-bitch
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0He had the clap and the seven-year-itch
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0He had the syph and the blue balls too
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0And he left them all in her ring-dang-do.
>
>
>
>
>>>From the song "Blue Balls from Belman" sung by Buford Pipen.=C2=A0 Issued o=
>n
>the 1981 LP Just Something My Uncle Told Me.=C2=A0 Learned in the 1930s.
>
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Blue Balls From Bellman
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Sung by "Buford Pippin"
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Blue balls from Bellman
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Come boys, come.
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Well they sure hung a sign[???]
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Hung a sign on her back door
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0One dollar down no less will do
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0To get a little smell of my ring-tang-do
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Blue balls from Bellman
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Come boys, come.
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Ain't coming after with a knife in the grass
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Cut off my dick, cut close to my ass
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Blue balls from Bellmen
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Come boys, come.
>
>
>
>
>Parody of School Days in the folklore collection titled "Apples of Eden"
>1945:
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 School Days
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0School days, school days,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Good old golden rule days
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0First you get blue balls and then you get clap,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0And then you get hell from your mammy and pap,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0And then to the doctor you must go,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0And get old John wrapped up in calico.
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0When you wrote on my slate,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0"I burnt you so"
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0When, we were a couple of kids.
>
>
>
>
>TIE MY PECKER TO A TREE
>(Tune: Chisolm Trail)
>
>CHORUS:
>Come and tie my pecker to a tree, to a tree
>Come and tie my pecker to a tree
>
>Fucked her sittin', fucked her lyin'
>If I'd had wings I'd fucked her flying
>
>I awoke in the morning and guess what I saw
>Fifteen crabs and big blue balls
>
>I went to a doctor cause my pecker was sore
>My God said the doctor you've been taken by a whore
>
>And now you can see I'm a peckerless man
>I fuck 'em with my finger and fool 'em when I can
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>The song "Ricky Dan Do" in the 1971 Australian fighter pilot songbook
>_Songs My Mother Taught Me_
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0There came a guy, a son of a bitch,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Who had the pox and the sailor's itch,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0He had blue balls and shankers too,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0And he played all night with her Ricky Dan Do
>
>
>
>
>The song "Ring Dang Do" in the songbook"Songs of Raunch" issued at UCLA
>in 1958.
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 How from out the hills there cciae a son-of-a-bitch
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 He had the clap* and the seven year itch=C2=A0 =C2=A0=C2=A0=
>=C2=A0*(clap hands)
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 He had the syph and the blue balls too,
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 And she let him ride on the Ring Dang Doo.
>
>
>
>This is the complete song of "John Brown's Body" from an untitled marine
>songbook c1943.
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 JOHN BROWN'S BODY
>
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 John Brownfs body1s in a better place than this,
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 Far from the clap and the dirty syphilis;
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 Blue-balls,.and the chancre, and the granulated piss:
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 His balls are soldered on!
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 Glory, glory, gonorrhea! Glory, glory, gonorrhea!
>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 Glory, glory, gonorrhea! His balls are soldered on!
>
>
>
>Another "Ring Dang Do" from the Death Rattler's 1951 marine songbook.
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0so along came a prick named mobey dick
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0he had the syph and the seven year itch
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0he had the clap and the blue balls too
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0and he put them ail in the ring dang doo
>
>
>
>
>>>From an untitled Hash House Harrier songbook c2006
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0WHO NEEDS SEX?
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Melody - Three Blind Mice
>
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Who needs sex?
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0Who needs sex?
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0It's no fun,
>=C2=A0=C2=A0=C2=A0It's no fun,
>
>=C2=A0 You meet a new women and go on a date,
>=C2=A0 You hug and you kiss and you think that it's great,
>=C2=A0 She gives you blue balls and you masturbate,
>=C2=A0 So, who needs sex?
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>The Sewing Machine
>The tune is "Down in the Valley."
>
>
>Down in Cunt Valley, where the bullshit runs thick,
>Where the soldier boys ramble, and babies come quick,
>That's where she lives, the gal I adore,
>That cock-sucking hussy, the Heidelberg whore.
>
>She took me upstairs and she turned out the light,
>And she said, "Big boy, you're here for the night."
>So I took down my pants and I crawled in between,
>And I started to sew on her sewing machine.
>
>I sewed and I sewed until crack of dawn,
>Then she said, "Big boy, you had better be gone.
>Come back tomorrow night without being seen,
>And you're welcome to sew on my sewing machine."
>
>She gave me the clap and the blue-balls too.
>The clap doesn't hurt, but the blue-balls do.
>For seventeen days, she hasn't been seen.
>I hope she's in Hell with her sewing machine.
>
>------------------------------------------------------------
>The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org

------------------------------------------------------------
The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org