Neuticles (most unnecessary candidate?)

[W Brewer]

Neuticles. If only we had known. Taiwan used to be overrun with stray dogs.
It's a lot better now. We were very responsible years ago, when we had our
puppy Sam (born on the 4th of July) neutered. The vet let us watch the
entire procedure. It was a very emotional experience, making sure his
tongue stayed hung outside his mouth. After removing the 'nads, the vet
held them up and said, "NT$500 in a Chinese restaurant!"
There is a saying here, "Hei gou zui-hao chi." ('Black dog is most
delicious.')  Bo sai, Sherlock.

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