[Ads-l] Joke Origin: "Do You Serve Lobsters Here?" "Yes, We Serve Anyone"

[ADSGarson O'Toole]

The joke in the subject line is a member of a family of gags which
includes the following two examples:

"Waiter, do you serve shrimps here?" "Sure. We don’t care how tall you
are. Sit down."

"Do you serve crabs?" "Yes, we treat all customers alike."

Nigel Rees discussed this family in the April 2026 issue of his "Quote
… Unquote" newsletter which inspired me to explore the topic.

The earliest match in this family I found appeared in "The Scioto
Gazette" of Chillicothe, Ohio in March 1901:

[Begin excerpt]
"Do you serve lobsters here?" asked the new arrival.
"Well," replied the waiter, "we 'as our instructions to discriminate
as much as possible among them as comes in to eat."
[End excerpt]

In each of these jokes, the seafood term is not interpreted as a menu
item; instead, the term is applied to the customer. Each joke can be
understood as an absurdist misunderstanding. Further, circa 1901 there
were several slang interpretations for "lobster". Here are three
senses listed in "Green's Dictionary of Slang":

[Begin excerpt]
2. (a) (US) a slow-witted, awkward, or gullible person; a general term
of abuse; esp. of a socially inept or foolish person.

2. (b) an older man who gives a younger woman presents and/or money in
return for sexual favours.

3 (US) in the context of obtaining money, one who is a waste of effort.
[End excerpt]

Here is a link to the Quote Investigator article:
https://quoteinvestigator.com/2026/04/21/serve-lobsters/

Feedback welcome
Garson O'Toole

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The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org