[Ads-l] Saying Origin: You Can=?UTF-8?Q?=E2=80=99t_?=Live With Them, and You Can't Live Without Them

[Emily Gordon]

You can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em,
There's something irresistable-ish about 'em...

—Kermit & Rowlf, "I Hope That Somethin' Better Comes Along" (From The
Muppet Movie/Soundtrack Version, by Jim Henson and Wim T. Schippers)

On Mon, Sep 14, 2026 at 8:24 AM ADSGarson O'Toole <
00001aa1be50b751-dmarc-request at listserv.uga.edu> wrote:

> Thanks for your response, Pete. The New York Times attributes the
> "can't shoot 'em" variant to comedian Steven Wright in 1985. Spin
> published a version referring to kids, and Playboy published one
> referring to men.
>
> Date: April 28, 1985
> Newspaper: The New York Times
> Newspaper Location: New York
> Section: The New York Times Magazine
> Article: Survival: The New York Joke by James Gleick
> Start Page 49, Quote Page 66
> [Begin excerpt]
> For example, a young comic named Steven Wright tells this joke: "Women
> — you can't live with 'em, you can't shoot 'em." It works in the city.
> "But if you went to the hinterlands they wouldn't know what to make of
> that," Grundfest says.
> [End excerpt]
>
> Date: October 1985
> Periodical: Spin
> Volume 1, Number 6
> Article: Why Young People Wear Black by Glenn O'Brien
> Quote Page 98, Column 1
> Publisher: Spin Magazine, New York
> [Begin excerpt]
> Kids! You can’t live with 'em . . . and you can't shoot 'em. What the
> heck's the matter with kids today? They look weird.
> [End excerpt]
>
> Date: November 1985
> Volume 32, Number 11
> Periodical: Playboy
> Article: Women: Extremely Trivial Pursuits by Cynthia Heimel
> Quote Pag 37, Column 3
> Publisher: Playboy Enterprises Inc.
> [Begin excerpt]
> "Men," said Rita. "Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em. Tell her,
> Jake, before someone else does."
> [End excerpt]
>
> Garson
>
> On Mon, Sep 14, 2026 at 10:06 AM Pete Morris
> <mr_peter_morris at outlook.com> wrote:
> >
> > Women, you can't live with them, pass the beer nuts.
> > - Norm Peterson, Cheers.
> >
> > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJiDzin8zqE
> >
> > -------------------------------------
> >
> > Women, can't live with them, can't shoot them.
> >
> > - Attributed to many.
> >
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
> The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org
>

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The American Dialect Society - http://www.americandialect.org