[gothic-l] Albareikis poem

[Grsartor at AOL.COM]

Hailai allai, þishun Albareik.

Albareiks asked whether his 39-line poem was so bad as to be not worthy of 
comment or critique. By no means! I regret there has been no response, and 
should like to say that I am impressed at how ingeniously he has succeeded in 
writing in a style reminiscent of Old English verse, such as Beowulf.

As for my own failure to respond, I plead that I have not got round to 
studying it as closely as it deserves, but at least I can offer comments on 
the first 10 lines. My suggestions are made with little regard for their 
metric suitability, since I find this subject beyond me; and some (most? 
all?) of them may be mistaken anyway. But first, a reminder of the lines in 
question:

1. Þamma háilaga háils, himinis wardja
2. þó gaskaft skóp, skáun táwida,
3. méra atta, manaséþ ussatida.
4. Gutþiuda frumiþa, gudisks táujónds,
5. sóei mériþa warþ máistan allama,
6. wulþagóstam waúrkjam, waírþóstam sigisam.
7. Swé máists mannins midjungarda-
8. aþaliggans allans Ansis séþái,
9. Gutwulfs jah Hulmuls jah Gáirmanna,
10. kindinós áudagans knóþs im habáidédun.

TRANSLATION:

1. To the holy one hail, heaven’s guardian
2. the creation shaped, the beautiful made,
3. famous father, generated mankind.
4. Originated the Gothic tribe, the divine maker, 
5. the tribe whose fame became greatest of all,
6. by most glorious deeds, by worthiest victories.
7. Chief of men on earth-
8. nobles all from the seed of the Aesir,
9. Godwulf and Hulmul and Garman,
10. blessed kings descent from them had.

Comments.

Line 1: Þamma háilaga háils, himinis wardja

If "hails" takes a dative, then "hailaga" must become "hailagin", and 
"wardja", being in apposition, become "wardjin". But note the construction in 
Mark 15:18, where "hails" takes a vocative: jah dugunnun goljan ina: hails, 
þiudan Iudaie! 
So perhaps the simplest amendment would be replacement of "þamma" by "o sa", 
since the rest of the line could then stand.

Line 4: Gutþiuda frumiþa, gudisks táujónds,

If "frumiþa" is to be construed as the attested word for origin, then the 
genitive "Gutþiudos" is required. If, on the other hand, it is to be taken as 
past tense of a postulated *frumjan, meaning to bring into existence, then 
"Gutþiuda" is right."taujonds" should be "taujands".

Line 5: sóei mériþa warþ máistan allama,

"whose fame" would I think be "þizozei meriþa", since it is the fame of the 
(feminine) Gutþiuda. The word for "greatest", referring to "meriþa", will 
also have to be feminine, but I am not sure how to construct the required 
phrase. In particular, I do not know when superlatives take the weak 
declension. If they are normally declined strong then perhaps "maista 
allaizo" would do. And the two superlatives in line 6 would have to end in 
"-aim" rather than "-am". But to return to line 5, another possibility might 
be to use the comparative in a phrase meaning "greater than any (other)". I 
leave it to others to decide how to do that, and whether it would be 
reasonable.

Line 6: wulþagóstam waúrkjam, waírþóstam sigisam.

I think "waurkjam" should be "waurstwam".

Line 7: Swé máists mannins midjungarda-

I think "mannins" should be either "manne" or "mannans/mans".

Line 10: kindinós áudagans knóþs im habáidédun.

"knoþs" should be "knoþ".

Lines 7-10:

7. Swé máists mannins midjungarda-      Chief of men on earth-
8. aþaliggans allans Ansis séþái,           nobles all from the seed of the 
Aesir,
9. Gutwulfs jah Hulmuls jah Gáirmanna,      Godwulf and Hulmul and Garman,
10. kindinós áudagans knóþs im habáidédun.  blessed kings descent from them 
had.

I am not sure how to construe the version in English, owing to ambiguity of 
the kind that is bound to occur in English when word-order is poetically 
distorted. I will assume that what is meant is

"The blessed kings Godwulf, Hulmul, and Garmanna, who were all nobles from 
the seed of the Aesir, and were chief of men on earth, had their descent from 
them (ie from the Gothic tribe)."

If so, then:

"maists" --> maistai (or auh(u)mistans?)
"aþaliggans allans" --> aþaliggos allai
audagans --> audagai

Gerry T.

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