Word Play in the Philippines

[Robert Lawless]

 From THE FAR EASTERN ECONOMIC REVIEW
By Nury Vittachi

THERE'S A SIGN ON Congressional Avenue in Manila that says: "Parking for
Costumers Only".  This may be a misspelling of "customer." But the
Philippine capital is so full of theatrical, brightly dressed individuals
that I prefer to think it may actually mean what it says.

This week, we'll take a reading tour of one of the most spirited
communities in Asia. The Philippines is full of wordplay . The local
accent, in which letters F and P are fairly interchangeable, is often used
very cleverly, such as at the flower shop in Diliman called Petal
Attraction.  Much of the wordplay in the Philippines is deliberate, with
retailers favouring witty names, often based on Western celeb rities and
movies. Reader Elgar Esteban found a bread shop called Anita Bakery, a
24-hour restaurant called Doris Day and Night, a garment shop called
Elizabeth Tailoring and a hairdresser called Felix The Cut.   Smart
travellers can decipher initially baffling signs by simply trying out a
Taglish (Tagalog-English) accent, such as that used on a sign at a
restaurant in Cebu: "We Hab Sop-Drink In Can An In Batol".  A sewing
accessories shop called Beads And Pieces also makes use of the local
accent.

Of course, there are also many signs with oddly chosen words, but they are
usually so entertaining that it would be a tragedy to "correct" them.   A
reader named Antonio "Tonyboy" Ramon T. Ongsiako (now there's a truly
Filipino name) found the following:  In a restaurant in Baguio: " Wanted:
Boy Waitress;" on a highway in Pampanga: "We Make Modern Antique Furniture
;" on the window of a photography shop in Cabanatuan: " We Shoot You While
You Wait;" on the glass wall of an eatery in Panay Avenue in Manila: "
Wanted: Waiter, Cashier, Washier  [for dish washer] ."

Some of the notices one sees are thought-provoking. A shoe store in
Pangasinan has a sign saying: " We Sell Imported Robber Shoes." Could these
be the sneakiest sort of sneakers?   On a house in Jaro, Iloilo , one finds
a sign saying: "House For Rent, Fully Furnaced." Tonyboy commented, "Boy,
it must be hot in there."    Occasionally, the signs are quite poignant.
Reader Gunilla Edlund saw one at a ferry pier outside Davao, southern
Philippines, which said: "Adults: 1USD; Child: 50 cents; Cadavers: subject
to negotiation."
But most are purely witty, and display a love of Americana. Reader Robert
Harland spotted a bakery named Bread Pitt, a Makati fast-food place selling
maruya (banana fritters) called Maruya Carey, a water-engineering firm
called Christopher Plumbing, a boutique called The Way We Wear, a video
rental shop called Leon King Video Rental, a restaurant in the Cainta
district of Rizal called Caintacky Fried Chicken, a local burger restaurant
called Mang Donald's, a doughnut shop called MacDonuts, a shop selling
lumpia (meat parcels) in Makati called Wrap and Roll, and two butchers
called Meating Place and Meatropolis.

Tourists from Europe may be intrigued to discover shops called Holland
Hopia and Poland Hopia. Both sell a type of Chinese pastry called hopia.
What's the story? The names are explained thus: Holland Hopia is the domain
of a man named Ho and Poland Hopia is run by a man named Po .

People in the Philippines also re-design English to be more efficient. "The
creative confusion between language and culture leads to more than just
simple unintentional errors in syntax, but in the adoption of new words,"
says reader Rob Goodfellow.   He came across a sign that said " House
Fersallarend."   Why use five words (house for sale or rent) when two will
do?    Tonyboy Ongsiako explains why there was so much wit in the
Philippines.

"We come from a country where you require a sense of humour to survive," he
says. "We have a 24-hour comedy show here called the government and a huge
reserve of comedians made up mostly of politicians and bad actors."