LL-L "Terms of address" 2004.04.23 (01) [E]

[Lowlands-L]

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L O W L A N D S - L * 23.APR.2004 (01) * ISSN 189-5582 * LCSN 96-4226
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From: Global Moose Translations <globalmoose at t-online.de>
Subject: LL-L "Terms of address" 2004.04.22 (13) [E]

Ron wrote:

> the course of personal growth.  Besides, how would I be able to live in
> peace if I never cease to feel rubbed the wrong way by social customs that
I
> encounter on a daily basis?
...
>  I prefer forced
> politeness to unreserved surliness and apathy as is commonly encountered
in
> German cities and in German delicatessen stores in North America and
> Australia.

Well, I don't. I prefer people who are not hiding behind a social mask. Life
is so much easier when you can count on people who act friendly really BEING
friendly. That more than makes up for all the surly ones (who are, by the
way, also encountered quite frequently in other European countries such as
France, the Netherlands and Belgium). I like to know whom I can trust, and
when everyone is "friendly" and "polite" in your face like a salesperson on
a commission, I tend to not trust anyone because heaven knows what their
true feelings and their true attitude are. In that respect I'm extremely
Northern German, I'm afraid.

No, I couldn't live in peace like that, which is one of the reasons I moved
back to Europe and never looked back - I got so tired of fighting windmills
(for example, actually ANSWERING the question "How are yooouuuu today?" -
since they asked). I'm not saying I could never get used to this "forced
politeness". After a while, I actually learned to just ignore it, or take it
for granted. And THAT was a frightening thought...

I wouldn't dream of denying other societies their own social customs, or
expecting them to accommodate me just because I'm used to something
different. This is especially true when I'm a visitor somewhere. But if you
actually live and work somewhere and feel that you can never truly adopt
this culture as your own because it goes against some of your strongest
beliefs - well, I guess then it's time to leave.

Gabriele Kahn

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