Two passages from Platonov's HAPPY MOSCOW

[Nora Moseman]

Or personify "night" even more-- "Night stands still and soon will lay down
dew."


2011/11/10 Penelope Burt <burt2151 at comcast.net>

> Not very delicate perhaps:
> "Night's still up [like a person might still be up late at night] and soon
> the dew will be lying down."
> On Nov 10, 2011, at 11:57 AM, Sentinel76 Astrakhan wrote:
>
> > I wouldn't double the "still."  Instead, I'd make it the sentence as
> succinct as possible:
> >
> > "It's still night and soon will be dew."
> >
> > In fact, translating Platonov, I'd do to English what he did to Russian.
> :)
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >> Date: Thu, 10 Nov 2011 10:44:45 -0500
> >> From: aisrael at AMERICAN.EDU
> >> Subject: Re: [SEELANGS] Two passages from Platonov's HAPPY MOSCOW
> >> To: SEELANGS at bama.ua.edu
> >>
> >> By adding words:
> >>
> >> "The night still stands still and soon the dew will be lying on the
> >> ground"
> >>
> >>
> >> On Nov 10, 2011, at 9:51 AM, Robert Chandler wrote:
> >>
> >>> Dear all,
> >>>
> >>> We are revising our earlier (Harvill) translation for publication
> >>> next year by NYRB CLassics.
> >>>
> >>> 1. At the beginning of chapter 7, Sartorius and Moscow Chestnova
> >>> catch a late tram to the outskirts of Moscow. after getting off the
> >>> tram, and not long before they lie down and make love, Sarorius says:
> >>>
> >>> -- Товарищ Сарториус, что мы будем
> >>> теперь делать? -- спросила Москва. --
> >>> Ведь ночь еще стоит и скоро ляжет
> >>> роса...
> >>>
> >>> "Comrade Sartorius, what are we going to do now?" asked Moscow.
> >>> "It's still night, soon there'll be dew on the
> >>> ground." (Harvill ed.)
> >>>
> >>> "Comrade Sartorius, what are we going to do now?" asked Moscow.
> >>> "It's still night, soon dew will be lying on the
> >>> ground." (revised)
> >>>
> >>> The play between 'stoit' and 'lyazhet' is, in the original, achieved
> >>> with great delicacy. Any ideas as to how we might reproduce this?
> >>>
> >>> *
> >>>
> >>> 2. (A few lines later) Под утро Москва и
> >>> Сарториус сели в землемерную яму,
> >>> обросшую теплым буьяном,
> >>> спрятавшемся здесь от культурных
> >>> полей, как кулак на хуторе.
> >>>
> >>> What is this zemlemernaya yama??? It seems to be an extremely
> >>> uncommon phrase, probably Platonov's own. Though it does possibly
> >>> evoke its opposite: землемерная вышка.
> >>>
> >>> This sentence has to some degree been anticipated a few pages
> >>> earlier, in the following: Sartorius smiled bleakly; he would have
> >>> liked to remain now in the very lowest place of the earth, or even
> >>> to find himself a place in an empty grave and, inseparably from
> >>> Moscow Chestnova, live out his life there until death.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>> All the best,
> >>>
> >>> Robert
> >>>
> >>> Robert Chandler, 42 Milson Road, London, W14 OLD
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
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> >>
> >> Alina Israeli
> >> Associate Professor of Russian
> >> LFS, American University
> >> 4400 Massachusetts Ave.
> >> Washington DC 20016
> >> (202) 885-2387 fax (202) 885-1076
> >> aisrael at american.edu
> >>
> >>
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> Penelope Burt
> 2151 California St NW, Apt 304
> Washington DC 20008
> phone: 202 332 4675
> email: burt2151 at comcast.net
>
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