Deathbed Quote: This Is No Time for Making New Enemies

Thu Feb 2 21:38:11 UTC 2012

There is famous deathbed anecdote about renouncing the devil that in
modern times is often ascribed to Voltaire or Niccolo Machiavelli.
Here is an example from a Nobel Prize banquet speech in 1995.

Cite: 1995 December 10, Speech at Banquet for the Nobel Prize Award by
Robert E. Lucas, Jr., [Lucas won the Sveriges Riksbank Prize in
Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel], From Les Prix Nobel. The
Nobel Prizes 1995, Editor Tore Frangsmyr, [Nobel Foundation],
Stockholm, 1996. (Accessed at nobelprize.org on February 2, 2012) link
http://www.nobelprize.org/nobel_prizes/economics/laureates/1995/lucas-speech.html
[Begin excerpt]
It is not the time to criticize central bankers or anyone else. When
Voltaire was dying, in his eighties, a priest in attendance called
upon him to renounce the devil. Voltaire considered his advice, but
decided not to follow it. "This is no time," he said, "to be making
new enemies". In this same spirit, I offer my thanks and good wishes
to the Bank of Sweden, to the Nobel Committee, and to everyone
involved in this wonderful occasion.
[End excerpt]

In 1979 the British writer and broadcaster Gyles Brandreth published a
compilation of "last words", and he explored the above anecdote. He
found that the story had been retold with several principal actors
filling the role of the deathbed comic.

Cite: 1979, The Last Word by Gyles Brandreth, Prefatory section: First
Words, Start Page 5, Quote Page 6, Sterling Publishing Co., New York.
(Verified on paper)
[Begin excerpt]
And when I have come across more than one claimant for a particular
set of last words, I've tended to drop the last words altogether. For
example, at least six people are reputed to have said to the clergyman
who was at their deathbed and asked them to renounce the devil and all
his works, "This is no time for making enemies!"
[End excerpt]

If a list member can find an instance of this joke schema before
August 6, 1856, or an instance attributed to Voltaire before September
21, 1974, or an instance attributed to Machiavelli before 1981 that
would be helpful. Thanks.

The earliest examples I have located are presented as jokes about an
expiring Irishman. Here are some selected citations.

Cite: 1856 August 06, The Nebraskian, Page 1, col 6, Issue 28, Omaha,
Nebraska. (19th Century Newspapers)
[Begin excerpt]
A dying Irishman was asked by his confessor if he was willing to
renounce the devil and all his works? "Oh, your honor, said Pat,
"don't ask me that; I'm going to a strange country, and I don't want
to make myself enemies."
[End excerpt]

The joke was reprinted with small variations in a variety of
publications for a few decades. Here are some cites.

Cite: 1856 August 27, Boston Investigator, Wit, Humor, and Sentiment,
Page 1, Column 5, Issue 18, Boston, Massachusetts, (19th Century
Newspapers)

Cite: 1857 July 25, Chicago Daily Tribune, [Freestanding article],
Page 0_3, Column 4, Chicago, Illinois. (ProQuest)

Cite: 1860 March 10, Saturday Evening Post, [Freestanding article],
Page 6, Column 2, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (ProQuest)

Here is an example of a very similar text fourteen years later.

Cite: 1870 October 08, Frank Leslie’s Illustrated Newspaper Fun for
the Family, Page 62, Column 2, Issue 784, New York, New York. (19th
Century Newspapers)
[Begin excerpt]
A dying Irishman was asked by his confessor if he was ready to
renounce the devil and all his works. "Oh, your honor," said Pat,
"don't ask me that; I am going to a strange country, and I don't
intend to make myself enemies."
[End excerpt]

In 1888 the term "Irishman" is not used but the words were given in dialect.

Cite: 1888 August 10, North China Herald and Supreme Court & Consular
Gazette, Chinese Characteristics, Start Page 169, Quote Page 170,
Column 2, [NewsArch Page 18], Volume XLI, Shanghai, China.
(NewspaperArchive)
[Begin excerpt]
A dying man was recommended by the priest to "renounce the devil, and
all his works," to which he made the suggestive reply, "I'm going to a
strange country, and I don't want to make meself any inimies!"
[End excerpt]

In 1898 the joke was claimed as part of Irish comedic culture.

Cite: 1898, Irish Life and Character by Michael MacDonagh, Chapter
XXI: At the Gates of Death, Page 371, Hodder & Stoughton, London.
(Google Books full view) link
http://books.google.com/books?id=zI5nAAAAMAAJ&q=%22renounce+the%22#v=snippet&
[Begin excerpt]
The Irish gaze with a look of drollery even into the eyes of death. A
dying Irishman was asked by his clergyman if he was prepared to
renounce the devil and all his works. "Oh sir!" he exclaimed, "don't
ask me that. I'm going to a strange country, and I don't want to make
myself enemies!"
[End excerpt]

In 1900 the speaker of the quip was switched to a "Canny Scot".

Cite: 1900 August, Washington News Letter Christian Science: Its
Origins and Aims by Oliver C. Sabin, Start Page 643, Quote Page 649,
Column 2, Number 11, Washington D.C. (Google Books full view) link
http://books.google.com/books?id=7DQQAAAAYAAJ&q=Canny#v=snippet&q=Canny&f=false
[Begin excerpt]
Its logical sequence was illustrated in the case of a "Canny Scot"
who, being on his death bed, was adjured by his pastor to "renounce
the devil and all his works," and mindful of his future state
answered, "No, I can ne'er do that, I am about to die, and I dinno ken
into whose hands I may fall in the next world, and I don't want to
make any enemy there."
[End excerpt]

In 1912 the story was told at a Fisheries Convention, and the dying
man was still an Irishman, but his words were somewhat different.

Cite: 1912, North Carolina Geological and Economic Survey: Economic
Paper Number 29, [Report of the Fisheries Convention Held at New Bern,
North Carolina, December 13, 1911, Compiled by Joseph Hyde Pratt],
Morning Session, Address by Hon. W. McDonald Lee, Page 14, State
Printers and Binders, Raleigh, North Carolina. (Google Books full
view)
http://books.google.com/books?id=0wgnAQAAIAAJ&q=renounce#v=snippet&
[Begin excerpt]
An Irishman upon one occasion, on his death bed, called in his
faithful priest for the purpose of giving him extreme unction. "Pat,
you say that you renounce the Devil?" but no word came from Pat. Again
the priest said, "Pat, say after me: I renounce the Devil." Still Pat
remained silent. The third time the priest said, "Say after me: I
renounce the Devil." Pat with his last breath said, "Father, I am in
such condition now that I do not care to antagonize anybody."
[End excerpt]

Cite: 1919 May, Good Furniture Magazine, How Good Furniture Is Built:
An Address Before the Architectural League of New York by John P.
Adams, Page 213, Column 2, The Dean-Hicks Company, Grand Rapids,
Michigan. (Google Books full view) link
http://books.google.com/books?id=zC4gAQAAMAAJ&q=sinner#v=snippet&
[Begin excerpt]
You have heard, perhaps, the story of the old sinner who lay on his
death bed. His pastor came to him and urged him to renounce the devil,
and he replied: "Renounce the devil? Why, pastor, this ain't no time
for me to make any enemies!"
[End excerpt]

In 1919 the nationality of the dying man is not specified. Instead, he
was simply described as an "old sinner'.

Cite: 1919 May, Good Furniture Magazine, How Good Furniture Is Built:
An Address Before the Architectural League of New York by John P.
Adams, Page 213, Column 2, The Dean-Hicks Company, Grand Rapids,
Michigan. (Google Books full view) link
http://books.google.com/books?id=zC4gAQAAMAAJ&q=sinner#v=snippet&
[Begin excerpt]
You have heard, perhaps, the story of the old sinner who lay on his
death bed. His pastor came to him and urged him to renounce the devil,
and he replied: "Renounce the devil? Why, pastor, this ain't no time
for me to make any enemies!"
[End excerpt]

Cite: 1923 July 15, San Diego Union, Page title: Boys and Girls, The
Fun Box, GNA Page 72, Column 4, San Diego, California. (GenealogyBank)
[Begin excerpt]
Won't Disturb St Peter
Parson (to dying man): "Pray, my good man, renounce the devil."
Dying Man: "Look here, parson, I'm in no position to make any new enemies."
[End excerpt]

Cite: 1924 March 27, Moville Mail, The American Legion: Old Foes Are
Best, Page 3, Column 3, Moville, Iowa. (NewspaperArchive)
[Begin excerpt]
Old Foes Are Best
Pat was hard hit and sinking rapidly, so a chaplain was summoned.
"Pat," he said gravely, "you are about to go west. While you have time
you must renounce the devil,"
"Father," replied Pat. "If I'm that bad off, 'tis in no,condition I am
to be after makin' new inimies." – American Legion Weekly.
[End excerpt]

In 1925 Life magazine ran a cartoon depicting two men standing and conversing.
The caption recorded the words of the man wearing religious garb
followed by the reply of the other man. This variant of the joke
did not use the setting of a deathbed.

Cite: 1925 July 9, Life, Illustration depicting two men conversing,
Page 26, Issue 2227, Life Publishing Company, New York. (ProQuest
Periodicals)
[Begin excerpt]
"SEE HERE, BILKINS, WHY DON'T YOU RENOUNCE THE DEVIL?"
"DON'T WANT TO GET HIM AGAINST ME - MAY HAVE TO SPEND A LOT OF TIME
WITH HIM SOME DAY!'
[End excerpt]

Now this presentation will jump forward to 1974. A newspaper in
Jamaica published an interview with English actor Sir Ralph David
Richardson and he attributed the quip to Voltaire.

Cite: 1974 September 21, The Gleaner, A lunch as good as a matinee by
Jeremy Campbell, Page 8, Column 5, Kingston, Jamaica.
(NewspaperArchive)
[Begin excerpt]
In his role as publisher, a director of The Bodley Head; he talks
about a new translation of Balzac, or somehow bringing under control
the sprawling output, 42 volumes of Voltaire, "The Great Unread."
"What a man." he said, "When Voltaire was on his deathbed a clever
priest came asking him to renounce the devil and all his works.
"Voltaire told him, "I don't think at this time of life I should start
making enemies."
[End excerpt]

Thanks, Garson

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