blond(e) jokes

[Karl V. Teeter]

Thanks, Monica, these are great, I am sending them to my four
daughters!  Yours, Karl
At 01:03 PM 9/13/2000 -0500, you wrote:
>My sister sent me these.  I know one of you is collecting blond(e) jokes,
>and I thought this might be of interest.  Forgive me if it's already been
>circulated.  Note especially the tenth one...
>
>- Monica
>
>
> >> It's "Let's pick on men instead of blondes" time
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
> >> > > A. Trustworthy.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath
> >> and
> >> > calling your name?
> >> > > A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
> >> > > A. Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why do men like smart women?
> >> > > A. Opposites attract.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. How do men exercise on the beach?
> >> > > A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
> >> > > A. ONE .........He just holds it up there and waits for the world to
> >>
> >> > revolve  around him.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. What did God say after creating man?
> >> > > A. I can do so much better.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
> >> > > A. Put the remote control between his toes.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. What's the smartest thing a man can say?
> >> > > A. "My wife says..."
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?
> >> > > A. So men can understand them.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why did God create man before woman?
> >> > > A. Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before
> >> creating
> >> > your masterpiece.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
> >> > > A. To stop the snoring before it starts.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
> >> > > A. Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
> >> > >
> >> > > Q. Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
> >> > > A. Because not one will stop and ask for directions.....