Haiku

[Guenther Ramm]

Hails, Frithureik!
  Guda(m) awiliuth, ni ainaha im ikei liutha waurkjau J
  The haiku is excellent!
  Would you allow some unprofessional remarks? I consulted the English translation at http://www.geocities.com/gutiska/ovrigt/haiku.html
  -          iuthos thiwe “descendents of thralls”
 maybe it could be expressed in one word like *thiwiliggos? Just fond of longer words J (and posts as you see)
  -          bairandans kaupajuke “carriers of the commercial yoke” – if bairandans is a participle (i.e. “those carrying the commercial yoke”) as it formally is here, then perhaps the object should stand in accusative (kaupajuka), if it is a noun (nomen agentis with -nd- stem), then the plural form would be bairands. I hope I don’t mistake here, but if I do, may the senior comrades correct me. By the way, kaupajuk(a) for “commercial yoke” is very remarkable. What is “commerce” then?
  -          Could you please tell something more to *stuthjan “to tether” (maybe it is the attested stothjan or its relative?)
  -          swaswe ins munum “as such we consider them” – if you mean waurteis, then swaswe ijos/thos (Acc. Pl. f.) 
, if arbja and gibos together, then perhaps ija/tho (Acc. Pl. n.). I’d say swaleika nimam (tho) (cf. the existing stable combination of words arbi niman “to inherit”, hence arbinumja “heir”).
  -          habam fra-liusan ijos “we have to lose them” – is haban + Infinitive a modal construction? I mean is it a Gothic one? (I just don’t know). If not, then maybe skulum fraliusan?
  -          in thaim waddjus garaihteins – in thaim waddjum
 Evidently a scribal error.
  -          thundos haihaitum “heros we call them” – would you please explain thundos?
  -          ufar waurstw leikis “except the body labour” – maybe alja or niba(i) would better translate “except”?
  -          ni waihteis sind bi unsis “no things are by us. (we own nothing)”. Very interesting
 Can anybody tell what Gothic “to belong to smb.” looks like? Here I’d have sind du unsis (I saw something similar in Italian: a noi “to us”, i.e. “belongs to us”).
  -          gif ins aggilum “give them to the angels. (kill them)” – wow!!! But in fact, who knows that, maybe skohslam J
  -          thize allaize lande – perhaps allaize thize lande?
  -          gaqimam skulum – gaqiman skulum
   
  Well, sorry for boring you with all these comments
  Ualarauans


Fredrik <gadrauhts at hotmail.com> wrote:  Hi!

I'm not that in to poetry but I've made a haiku now...in gothic ofcoz.

As you know a haiku is a japanese poem with three rows with 5 
syllables in the first, 7 in the 2nd and 5 in the 3rd.
I also intend to get the 1st and 2nd to rhyme or sound similar in the 
end. The 3rd row is meant to rhyme with the 3rd of previous part.

I just wanna know if it make any sence at all to you. So here it is:

(There might be errors in both grammar and vocabulary so you may tell 
me if you find any)

Weis iuþôs þiwê,
Bairandans káupajukê.
Stuþidái sijum.

Waúrteis unsarôs,
Swê arbja jah swê gibôs,
Swaswê ins munum.

Eisarna-bandjôs,
Habam fra-liusan ijôs.
Frijei du sunum!

Haírdôs weihandeins,
In þáim waddjus garaíhteins.
Þundôs haíháitum.


/Fredrik






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