LL-L "Humor" 2001.11.18 (02) [E/S]

[Lowlands-L]

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 L O W L A N D S - L * 18.NOV.2001 (02) * ISSN 189-5582 * LCSN 96-4226
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From: Sandy Fleming [sandy at scotstext.org]
Subject: "Humor"

> From: Margaret Tarbet <oneko at mindspring.com>
> Subject: Humor
>
> Apropos the subject in general rather than anyone else's post...
>
> I find some of the 'ethnic humor' to be worth a giggle --  usually
> the better-hearted ones; the nasty ones seem often to be 99% nasty,
> 1% humor.  I reckon the best way for anyone to take the curse off is
> to tell such jokes against their own group rather than someone
> else's.  Since only a few such jokes result in a clash of
> stereotypes, it seems to work rather well.

My favourite along these lines is most definitely David Rorie's
"The Pawky Duke"...

THE PAWKY DUKE

There aince was a very pawky duke,
    Far kent for his joukery-pawkery,
Wha owned a hoose wi a gran' outlook,
    A gairden an a rockery.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    Hoot ay!  An a rockery!
For a bonnet laird wi a sma' kailyaird
    Is naething but a mockery.

He dwalt far up a Heelant glen
    Where the foamin flood an the crag is,
He dines each day on the usquebae
    An he washed it doon wi haggis.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    Hoot ay!  An a haggis!
For that's the way that the Heelanters dae
    Whaur the foamin flood an the crag is.

He wore a sporran an a dirk,
    An a beard like besom bristles,
He was an elder o the kirk
    And he hated kists o whistles.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    An doon on kists o whistles!
They're a' reid-heidit fowk up North
    Wi beards like besom bristles.

His hair was reid as ony rose,
    His legs was lang an bony,
He keepit a hoast an a rubbin-post
    An a buskit cockernony.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    An a buskit cockemony!
Ye ne'er will ken true Heelantmen
    Wha'll own they hadna ony.

Syne ilka fowre oors throu the day
    He took a muckle jorum,
An' when the gloamin gaither'd grey
    Got fou wi great decorum.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    Blin' fou wi great decorum!
There ne'er were males amang the Gaels
    But lo'ed a muckle jorum.

An if he met a Sassenach,
    Attour in Caledonia,
He gart him lilt in a cotton kilt
    Till he took an acute pneumonia.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    An a Sassenach wi pneumonia!
He lat him feel that the Land o the Leal
    'S nae far frae Caledonia.

Then aye afore he socht his bed
    He danced the Gillie Callum,
An wi's Kilmarnock owre his neb
    What evil could befa' him?
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    What evil could befa' him?
When he cast his buits an soopled his cuits
    Wi a gude-gaun Gillie Callum.

But they brocht a joke, they did indeed,
    Ae day for his eedification,
An they needed to trephine his heid,
    Sae he dee'd o the operation.
Hech mon!  The pawky duke!
    Wae's me for the operation!
For weel I wot this typical Scot
    Was a michty loss to the nation.

-David Rorie

Sandy
http://scotstext.org
A dinna dout him, for he says that he
On nae accoont wad ever tell a lee.
                          - C.W.Wade,
                    'The Adventures o McNab'

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