LL-L 'Customs' 2006.11.03 (01) [E]

[Lowlands-L]

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L O W L A N D S - L * 03 November 2006 * Volume 01
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From: 'Hugo Zweep' [Zweep at bigpond.com]
Subject: LL-L 'Customs' 2006.11.02 (3) [E]

Dear all

Now that you mention it, I don't ever recall my parents expressing love for
me verbally although they certainly showed it in the way they interacted -
mainly by considering my views and actions as being worthwhile and
expressing pride - but always to me and not in a roundabout way through and
to others. Does any lowlands language in fact have a word or phrase for
this. I don't mean 'ich liebe dich" or "ik houd van jou" as lovers speak to
each other, but as parents speak to their children.

I also wonder whether this lack of verbal expression is just a lowland
thing. My wife's mother was a second generation Australian - her
grandparents coming from Scotland and England. Her father was a small
landholder where there was little money, existence precarious and all 9
children had to learn to get on with it. I knew four of those children and
all of them were reticent in showing emotional connection, let alone
verbalising it. Sue's mother still couldn't in her mid eighties show any
affection to her daughter but was able to show affection to her
grandchildren. Yet I knew she loved her daughter.

I put it all down to her original tough economic circumstances and that it
was related to the traditional laconic attitude of Australian country people
where you proved yourself by actions rather than words. From family stories
I understand that Sue's grandfather had been a stern, unemotional man. I
found support in this theory in the fact that my parents were much harder on
my brother and sister, who were much older than me and grew up when life was
hard for my parents.

I have always taken it that a lowlander's life was tough and that their
reputed aloofness had to do with that, just as many other country people all
over the world were stern because they tried to make sure their children
were independent at an early age so that they would survive better. In other
words - this aloofness was widespread (I think of stories of French
peasantry) before a relatively easy and secure life was the norm.

Life is now certainly more physically secure and people may feel that they
can afford to lower their guard more often and show their inner feelings
openly.

Hugo Zweep

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From: R. F. Hahn [sassisch at yahoo.com]
Subject: Customs

Hugo,

In Northern Low Saxon of Germany "I love you" is _Ik hev dy leyv_ (_Ik heff di
leef_ [?Ik hEf di lE.If]).  It's to be used in all contexts.  In German, at least
in Northern German, on the other hand, _Ich liebe dich_ tends to be limited to
expression between lovers, while _Ich habe dich lieb_ is to be used in other
contexts.

I consider it gross generalization and stereotyping to say that such expressions
are used rarely or not at all in Lowlands Germany.  Even if I don't talk about my
own relatives (with roots in the east), I remember people regularly using such
expressions, both in the city and in the country.  It may be true that in
supposedly "sober" Protestant culture of the Lowlands there is a tradition of
avoiding expressions of affection.  However, I believe that this is on the way
out (as also demonstrated by Jonny) and these days is predominant only in some
communities that are "at the back of beyond" and/or might be called "xenophobic"
in that they do not readily absorb new settlers and outside influences. 

Northern Germany's population, including its Low-Saxon-speaking population, is
far too diverse to generalize that way or to know what is "typical."  This has
been so especially since the end of the Second World War when masses of displaced
people from the east settled in most communities, and even before that,
especially since the Industrial Revolution, there was a lot of migration.  Most
of these migrants were Easterners whose cultures came interwoven with Slavonic
and Baltic traditions, thus with traditionally greater freedom of emotional
expression.  In the meantime there has been a lot of mixing in most communities,
not only with Easterners but also with Southerners, not to mention "foreigners."

Regards,
Reinhard/Ron

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